Though I can’t speak for all INFP women, dating and I do not mesh well, to say the least.
My general tactic towards any of that lovey-dovey stuff is to ignore the existence of my object of affection, as if he has been blasted off the face of the Earth by turbo-engine Alien shooters and left only a smoking black hole where he once stood.
I know. I get all the boys.
No, but, seriously. In high school, I pointedly ignored my crush until he thought I hated him. Poor guy. And I have absolutely no idea why I do it. After all, I’ve done scarier things than confess my feelings, like give speeches before hundreds of people (quite terrifying, if you’re an reclusive introvert). But, when it comes to love, my heart meets a brick wall.
These are some ways to get on an INFP’s good terms, romantically. Though I can’t speak for all INFPs, nor all INFP women, well, this is just my point of view, ‘kay? Coming out of my little noggin. Please note, bad attempts at humor may be forthcoming.
1. BEING APPROACHED FIRST. PLEASE.
Oh gosh, that sounded desperate. Well, it’s true. Like I said, I completely ignore anyone I have any feelings for because rejection for INFPs is like a rejection of our entire being, our souls. I remember this one fellow snubbed me once when I tried tentatively to engage him in flirtatious conversation. Let me tell you, that feeling? It’s crushing. So, please, approach us first. Trust me. That INFP is not going to come to you. Just, make the first move, and we will be very friendly, and also very grateful.
I think INFPs are generally a bit weird. I mean, we all are, but INFPs are a little bit more, crazier, if you know what I mean. If you chanced upon me at an inopportune time, you’d probably find me gallivanting around the room in a series of wiggly dance moves, singing a song in my head and having a conversation out loud with an imaginary person just to practice the words before I say them in real life. Must be all that latent creativity and staying-inside-our-heads-too-much business. Either way, if you’re a little weird, too, and are unafraid to show it, chances are INFPs are more likely to notice you, find you more approachable, and appreciate you.
Look, I know some women, and men, like the ‘bad boys’, or the ‘bad girls’. They want a bite of the forbidden, exciting fruit. INFPs aren’t like that. We appreciate genuinely kind people. In fact, when we see potential romantic partners open doors for people, help old ladies cross the road, let friends borrow their money, offer words of encouragement, you rocket up on our good list. Hey, all I’m saying is, guys who pet cats and talk to animals make my heart flutter. Just give me a male version of Snow White, and I’ll be happy. Um. Minus the incessant singing, though. That’d get on my nerves.
But, let’s be serious. Let’s stop here. I know what you’re thinking. This is list is frivolous. It’s shallow. Anyone would appreciate these things. Okay. Fine. Let’s dig our fingers into the guts of life, shall we? Twiddle a couple of veins, prod at some squishy organs? Okay. You are asked for it.
THIS. IS. THE. SINGLE. THING. INFPS. WOULD. APPRECIATE. YOU READY?
Many INFPs experience existential depression. Trust me, I checked the internet, and have met other INFPs who have experienced it too, through this blog. So. This is it. This would be kind of like a deal breaker for me, and probably for many INFPs too.
You know what would really seal the deal?
If the love of my life put his hands on my shoulders, looked me in the eyes, and said, with the fullest conviction he could possibly muster, ‘I know. I know how you feel. It’s crazy, how I exist, you exist, and we’re looking into each other’s eyes right now. Life is crazy, death is crazy, existence is crazy, and all the world and the universe is a interstellar loony bin. I don’t understand anything, either. But it’s okay. I’m here now. I’m here now. And we will love each other, we will spend mornings having philosophical rambles about life, we will pet cats until our hands fall off, we will get that little isolated cottage, we will spend evenings reading books by the fireplace, and damn it to hell I don’t care if we’re going to die and our rotted bodies will fade into the wash of time and oblivion, we’re going to laugh and love and scream and live and be happy, you and me, okay?’
That’s what I would appreciate. That’s what an INFP would appreciate.
*shuffles off into a corner, sniffling*
PS: Having trouble getting images to show up on my actual blog. They show up in the reader, but not on the actual pages. Any pointers? The WordPress publishing format has changed, and, being the technologically inept gal I am, I am befuddled.